I just finished reading an interesting post on Copyblogger by Sonia Simone. I love people who aren’t afraid to question the status quo or express an opposing viewpoint to acceptable practices. I love it even when I don’t agree with them, because it keeps the conversation going, ensures we don’t get complacent, and pushes us to explore all the avenues.

The mantra in social media is to invite feedback, engage in conversation. Sonia isn’t advocating ignoring comments. Rather, she suggests we should:

• Focus on where we want to go
• Develop a “red velvet rope policy”
• Ask ourselves “Is this person my customer?” whenever we receive a negative remark.

It’s an article worth the read.

“Are You Getting Dangerous Feedback from Your Readers and Prospects”

As I mentioned in my last post, Work-Life Balance: Finding Inner Peace Despite External Turmoil, Simma Lieberman shared many pearls of wisdom at the last Women in Consulting (WIC) meeting. As I was going through the business cards from that meeting, I came across Simma’s. On it was eight steps to stress management. I thought I’d share them with you. Make sure to check out her site and blog for more stress management and work-life balance advice.

1. Breathe. Remember to breathe. Start each day with five minutes of deep breathing. Take five deep breaths when feeling stressed or anxious.
   Me: the key is to remember; maybe I should add it to Outlook, following step # 6.
2. Visualize. Stop negative/obsessive thoughts by visualizing a positive scene, e.g., the beach, mountains, fishing.
   Me: right now, bed with at least eight hours of uninterrupted sleep is a positive scene for me.  
3. Process. Decide when you can control, and take action. Change the things you can. Learn to let go of the things you can’t control.
   Me: I go, I go, I’m going to learn to let go. This is a new mantra I’m going to work on following. It’s that one-step-at-a-time thing I referenced in my last post. I’m sure I will fall at times, but like the toddler learning to walk, I’ll just get up and keep going.
4. Stop worrying. Change destructive self-talk to constructive self-talk.
   Me: Whew! At least one of these is easy for me. I tend not to be worrier. I find it a waste of energy. But for those times when I do worry, I’ll change the destructive tapes.
5. Schedule. Put yourself on the calendar for fun and relaxation. If you don’t write it in, it won’t happen.
   Me: I’m scheduling a massage first thing tomorrow morning — once it’s a reasonable time to call! Actually, I like this one, as it’s not uncommon for me to let this go. I’m also going to figure out another time to workout besides 5:30am, as it’s not ideal when I’m getting to bed late due to work. Plus, it’s not my favorite time. I feel better when I work out. It helps me relax. It reduces stress.
6. Support. You don’t have to do it alone.  Create a support system of friends.
   Me: this is where WIC is great. All of my WIC colleagues understand better than anyone what I’m going through when it comes to work stresses and work-life balance.
7. Accept. You’ll never be totally caught up in your work. If you were, they wouldn’t need you.
   Me: okay, I’ll accept it. I guess I have to let go of that day dream. As a consultant, I definitely want to be needed!
8. Breathe. Remember to breath!! End each day with at least five minutes of deep breathing.
   Me: I’m off to breath!

Last Thursday, at the Women in Consulting (WIC) meeting at Michael’s at Shoreline, I had the pleasure of listening to speaker Simma Lieberman discuss work-life balance for consultants. Given all that’s happening in my life, this was a timely topic indeed — one that I was looking forward to with great anticipation. I was not disappointed.

Simma (www.simmalieberman.com) shared many pearls of wisdom that evening. One that really struck a chord was the idea that real balance comes from achieving an inner peace regardless of what’s going on in your life.

Sure, I’d heard it before — but you can never hear it enough. It’s true. It’s not easy (for most of us anyway). It takes a conscious effort. And it starts with paying attention to the negative tapes that are part of our everyday dialogue; that are our automatic response to life experiences — especially stressful ones.

This appeals to me because, for the most part, I can’t control what happens around me. And if what’s happening around me is seriously stressing me out, I’d sure love to be able to control or influence something. And my response is the only thing I can control. Doing so may even influence all the “stuff” happening around me. BUT…how do I control those pesky thoughts? The same way I learned to walk — one step at a time.

Taking It One Step at a Time

The thoughts that follow didn’t come from Simma in this exact form. Some she specifically said. Some I’m inferring. And some have come from other readings. But, they’re all first steps that we can take towards inner peace.

• Be aware of your thoughts and stop negative statements in their tracks.
• Rephrase your response (even if it’s just an internal conversation); come up with an alternative possibility or explanation or statement.
• Cultivate a spirit of thankfulness.

Understanding the Power of Gratitude

I’m a big believer that our thoughts can help manifest our realities; it’s been shown in medicine a lot of times. Cultivating a spirit of thankfulness is a good example of that. I was thinking about it a lot over the past couple of days and then in my inbox today appears an email about a new book, Learning to Dance in the Rain: The Power of Gratitude by Mac Anderson and BJ Gallagher. You can preview the book at http://www.simpletruths.com/flash_files/ibDITR/ibDITR.html if interested. (NOTE: I’m in no way related to this book, nor do I benefit from the sale of it.)

Here are a couple of key things from the book and a short video about a companion poem, “Weather Report” by BJ Gallagher (http://www.danceintherainmovie.com/) that underscore the concept of changing your thought patterns:

• “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain!” Vivian Green
• “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” Melody Beattie

Some would say that it’s pretty stormy for many consultants right now. Waiting for it to pass isn’t going to make it better. As Gallagher writes, “we all face adversity in our life. It’s not the adversity, but how we react to it that will determine the joy and happiness in our lives.” According to the recent WIC Compensation Survey, many consultants are adopting this positive mindset, such as “I decided to opt out of the recession. My attitude has kept my business growing and moving forward.”

For those of us who are fortunate to be busy with work while trying to juggle parenthood, aging parents, family health issues, and/or other daily life experiences, we face another set of challenges. I fall into that group. And I choose to be thankful.

When I’m working until midnight for weeks on end, instead of bemoaning my fate, I’m thankful that I have work.

When I have a day where I’m constantly moving between consultant and mom with barely a moment to rest, I’m thankful and honored to have such a beautiful, special daughter who loves me unconditionally and keeps me in the moment at least some of the time.

And when I’m faced with the challenges of running a consulting business that require me to wear multiple hats and sometimes deal with stressful situations, I’m grateful for WIC and all the support, insights, and friendships it offers. It would be impossible to maintain the success that I’m experiencing — not to mention my sanity — without this wonderful organization.

I just read a great article in the Wall Street Journal in the Small Business section: In Recession Specials, Small Firms Revise Pricing.

While the article focuses on small businesses other than consulting, its core message is worth noting if you find your client pool drying up during the current economic client.

Be creative. Be flexible. Be open (to new ideas). These are the ideas that I take away from this article, which are good to remember even when times aren’t tough.

Okay, I admitted in a previous post on Nine Twitter Tips for Business that I’m not someone who follows everyone who follows me because it’s the polite thing to do. So of course, I would find this nice little post on the TerraFarm blog to my liking.

Here are Tom’s top 10, all of which are worth keeping in mind as you start to Tweet:

1. Your picture hasn’t been set.
2. Your name is comprised of works like money, cash, free, sex….
3. You auto-DM me when I follow you.
4. Your Tweets are full of foul language.
5. You constantly lash out at me or others.
6. You constantly push your own product, service or blog, and tweet about nothing else
7. You’re never positive. Ever.
8. Your bio is empty and you live “nowhere.”
9. You haven’t Tweeted in months.
10. You are never “live.”

Read the full “10 Reasons to Unfollow/Not Follow Someone on Twitter” article

Jason Snell of Macworld.com wrote a nice overview on nine ways to use Twitter for business. It’s a great introduction for those who are unsure how Twitter can be used for business.

I agree with everything he says for the most part, with the caveat that you should assess any recommendations in light of your own audience, as well as what makes sense for your business. Consumer companies will have different needs from business-to-business companies who will have different needs from consultants and so on. The key is to view Twitter as a tool and not all tools work for all people.

The one recommendation I disagree with in part is “# 3: Follow people who are relevant…it’s polite to follow people. And by following people you are creating an ecosystem — people will see who you are following and consider those as suggestions for users they should follow as well.”

Yes, you should follow relevant people. And it may be polite to follow someone who follows you, but is it in your best interest to follow everyone who follows you? No is my philosophy. Follow people who make sense for you to follow.  For example, I won’t follow people who: 

• Never Tweet anything of interest to me
• Neglect to provide a bio and/or a link to more information about them
• Are only interested in selling me “stuff”
• Bombard followers with a plethora of Tweets daily – there are people who post 30 or more times in a day; and that’s way more than I want to here from anyone person

These are some of my personal guidelines for following people. They’re based on my reasons for using Twitter. I view Twitter as an information resource. So for me, it’s about sharing and receiving information.

Here are the high-level tips:

• Don’t automate it
• Be conversational
• Follow people who are relevant
• Make sure your people are on Twitter, and refer to them
• Answer your mentions
• Search for your name
• Consider creating sub-accounts for sections of your business or customer base
• Use Twitter to ask your customers questions…and get good answers
• Be a good Twitter citizen

Read the full “Nine Twitter Tips for Business” article

For those of you managing a WordPress blog but aren’t backing up your site, Christopher Penn posted a nice article on how to back up your WordPress blog in 60 seconds. When reading the article, make sure to read the couple of comments at the end that refer to also backing up database files (pasted below, too) 

“Yeah… I use a plug-in that automatically backs up the whole database and emails it to me. Daily. I save a month’s worth of backups so if something goes ugly or gets hacked, I can walk it back to when it WORKED.”

“Please be aware, though, that the WP export function only backs up internal-to-WordPress portions of your database. If you use plug-ins that store information in DB fields (such as PodPress), this will not keep that data safe. For that, I suggest you use WP-DB-Backup.”

Read the full “How to Back Up Your WordPress Blog in 60 Seconds” article

For those consultants who have launched a Facebook page or are considering doing so, this article on allfacebook.com reviews a new measurement tool released by Facebook called “Post Quality.” According to Facebook, it measures “how engaging your content is to Facebook users. A higher Post Quality indicates material that better engages users.”

For those unfamiliar with Facebook Pages, these are different from the personal pages that most people recognize. The capabilities are very similar to personal pages, but Facebook Pages are for organizations, companies of all sizes, consultants, etc.

Read the full “Facebook Introduces Post Quality Score for Pages” on allfacebook.com.

Google has a relatively new tool that allows you to create a profile that may start appearing on page one of Google searches almost immediately. 

In fact, my profile appeared at the bottom of page one right after publishing. Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter still appear at the top, as will your own site (hopefully!); but it’s another opportunity to increase your visibility and add all important links to your company site, LinkedIn and Twitter profiles, and any other relevant site.

Profiles are easy to create and can include:

• Your name and title
• Links to various websites (I included my company’s site, LinkedIn profile, and Twitter profile, as well as WIC’s website and blog.)
• A brief bio, including links
• Photos (I uploaded images of some of my customer solution snap shots. NOTE: the photos have to reside on Picasa, Flickr, or other photo-sharing site and must be publicly viewable. I didn’t have any such account, but it only took a few minutes to create a Flickr account and upload the photos.)

Create your own Google profile now

Checkout my Google profile as an example

Ann Handley, editor in chief of MarketingProfs (a WIC partner) posted an article on Mashable about a Twitter survey conducted by MarketingProfs. It’s worth the read, but then again, I’m biased. It was nice to see I’m not the only one who:

• Doesn’t follow everyone who follows me, and doesn’t expect everyone I follow to return the favor 
• Doesn’t think large twitter followings = greater intelligence, expertise, or respect
• Isn’t bothered if nobody responds to my tweets (but I do enjoy reading every response and engaging in dialogue–it’s just not every post warrants a response)
• Loves the information sharing that happens on Twitter

Read “Inside the Minds of Twitter Users“